Our Wedding Disaster
by Sux2budude
Summary: Puck and Quinn want to get married, but it seems like every time they tried, there was always some type of disaster just waiting to happen at that moment. But even if the whole world would try to stop them, they were determined to be together. No matter the consequences, they fought through it all, because there was nothing in this world that could ever keep them apart.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Our Wedding Disaster

Pairing: Quinn/Puck

Summary: Puck and Quinn have been trying to get married for the past ten months, and it seems like every time they tried, there was some disaster just waiting to happen at that moment. But with everything and everyone preventing their wedding from happening, they were determined to be together. No matter the consequences, they fought through it all, because there was nothing in this world that could ever keep them apart.

Disclaimer: I don't own glee or anything else in this world.

Author's Note: This was just an idea I suddenly had in the middle of an all night movie marathon that my sister forced me into. This is the result of _Pirates of the Caribbean 3, Bride Wars, _and my own imagination. I think the storyline has been used before, but I'm not exactly sure. It's AU, but I hope you like it, and please review!

_Our Wedding Disasters: Chapter One_

Quinn flopped down onto one of the chairs in the chapel and wiped away at her tears angrily. Her beautiful custom made wedding dress was nearly in shreds, the train of the dress was lost somewhere in the back of the chapel, and the bouquet was lying in pieces by the altar. This wasn't the first _or _second time this has happened. This was actually the fourth time. Everything was a mess, just like the first three times.

Each time was different, but it all prevented one thing. It prevented her from finally marrying her fiancé, Noah Puckerman.

Quinn Fabray was beyond angry. She was furious.

Was this some sort of sick joke? Was she not allowed to happily marry the man of her dreams and love of her life? Is she not allowed to finally become Mrs. Quinn Puckerman? Was this a sign? Because if it is, whoever the hell was sending this stupid ass sign was going to have to do a lot better than this, for her to even consider giving up on her fiancé.

The bride was pulled out of her thoughts by her Maid of honor, Rachel who was sent by the groom to check on her.

"How are you holding up?" the brunette asked in concern.

Quinn shook her head.

She doesn't have anything to say because she's just confused as to why this was happening to her. She's a good girl, who went to church, never smoked, or did drugs, she's only drank a couple of times, but it wasn't like she was drunk in any of those times, so she should be off the hook for that. She had sex only a handful of times, and even then, it was to the man that she's been engaged to for ten long months, and been trying to marry for eight months. She should be justified by the fact that the only guy she's ever slept with is her fiancé. So why was this happening to her? …To them.

This was just terrible. Even Rachel, (who loved weddings) was annoyed beyond belief that she has been Maid of honor four times, to the very same bride, whose wedding kept getting interrupted at the last minute.

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The first time Quinn and Puck tried to get married, was 8 months ago, in a church. The blonde bride was devastated when the groom didn't even show up to their wedding. They had sent the Limousine to pick Puck up from the hotel, and it never came back. The church bells were ringing, and the groom and the best man were the only ones who weren't in the church. Quinn had had a mini panic attack, and threw up in the back of one of the church benches. She cried as she kept repeating over and over to her Maid of honor that she knew her fiancé would have cold feet and wouldn't show up. Rachel tried to calm the blonde down by telling her that Puck loves her and was dying to marry her.

"If he wanted to marry me, then where the hell is he?" the blonde had screamed, then went on to saying that Puck realized he didn't want to marry her because she's a crazy bitch, to which the tiny brunette had shook the blonde and told her to get her shit together because there has to be a logical explanation as to why the groom, and the best man were missing.

Turned out, Puck and Finn were taken into custody by the F.B.I for interrogation because they matched the description of two guys who were caught on security surveillance cameras, breaking into a drug store and stealing a cabinet of drugs, and an entire Viagra shelf. Apparently, the thieves actually looked like Puck and Finn. One of them sporting a Mohawk, and the other was as tall as Finn.

However, after a two day investigation, and a solid alibi from their families and friends, the F.B.I finally caught the real culprits, and apologized to the two men for disrupting Puck's wedding. Needless to say, Puck finally agreed with Quinn's pleas, and chopped off his Mohawk.

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The second time, the wedding was held around a little gazebo in Appleseed Park, on a beautifully sunny day. It was two months after the first attempt. Everything was perfect, and everyone was accounted for. Puck was standing nervously in the perfectly decorated gazebo, waiting for his bride to walk down the aisle, until the wedding started, and no one could find her and the Maid of Honor. Puck had nearly gone ballistic when no one knew where his bride was. He ran through the whole park, frantically calling out Quinn's name, and asking everyone he saw if they've seen a blonde girl in a white dress. Finn had dragged him back to where the wedding was held, and tried to calm the worried groom down.

QPQPQPQPQPQP

Quinn and Rachel were on their way to the wedding, only a half hour away from the Park, and an hour before it starts. Quinn was bouncing up and down in her seat, anticipating the day's events, and just dying to get to the wedding and marry her fiancé already, but of course, they had to stop at a red light.

A few seconds later, a white van pulled up right in front of them, and four guys in ski masks jumped out, forcefully dragging the two girls into the van.

After nearly 20 minutes of waiting, and a few hundred phone calls from the groom and best man to the bride and Maid of honor, the two guys gave up waiting and went out to look for Quinn and Rachel. They notified the police, and as a favor for the drug store misunderstanding, the F.B.I agents who had taken them into custody two months before, decided to help the two guys out. Nearly three hours later, the F.B.I turned up with video footages from a traffic light camera, where they saw Quinn and Rachel being dragged, kicking and screaming, into a white van.

They managed to get the license plate number, and traced it to some old guy named Marty Davis. They ran his name in the system, and found three different criminal records on the guy. He was arrested twenty two years ago for kidnapping. He was released two years ago, and was charged a few months ago, with smuggling women and drugs onto an unknown export ship, but there was no proof, so they let him go. The F.B.I ran a search on the ship's schedule, and found out that it would be leaving in eight hours.

The F.B.I, immediately got a warrant to search the ship, and went straight to Youngstown, North Lima where the ship was docked.

When they arrived there, Puck and Finn were instructed to stay outside where it's safe, but the F.B.I's words were left on deaf ears because the two guys were nearly going crazy with worry. They went ahead on their own, and split up to search for Quinn and Rachel. When Puck found the two girls, they were both in the middle of strangling one of the guards to death, with their bare hands. He called Finn after smashing the guards face into the ships railing, and the couples came out unharmed. Half an hour later, the F.B.I emerged with at least 35 girls (who had all been kidnapped as well), and a whole stash of cocaine, and other drugs. All the guards, and kidnappers were sent to prison, and the shipping company was closed down for illegal dealings with criminals. Marty Davis was tracked down and thrown back into prison, but not after he threatened Puck, Finn, Quinn, and Rachel. The man saying that this wouldn't be the last that they see of him, and that they would get what was coming to them.

After that incident, Puck made sure to enroll himself and his fiancé in a Kick-boxing, Tae Kwon Do, and Jujitsu class, and even a fencing class, where they learned the arts of martial arts, sword fighting, defense techniques, and other forms of fighting, for three whole months. "Just to be safe", Puck had said. Quinn only agreed because she did _not _want a repeat of their kidnapping, and she wants to be able to defend herself if something like that ever happens again. Finn and Rachel had joined the couple in the classes, so they could also avoid any repeats of the previous incident.

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The third time.

Quinn and Puck had decided to invite only their close families, and friends to their wedding. It was just a little private wedding, held in the Fabray residence.

This time, Quinn and Puck were both there. The wedding went perfectly, and everything ended as perfectly as any other wedding would end. They managed to go through the whole ceremony without a single bad thing happening. That was until the day ended and they were at the airport, waiting for their plane to Hawaii for their honeymoon.

They were in the middle of checking in, when the news came on the television at the airport, and the first thing they saw nearly sent the couple into cardiac arrest.

Puck, who had been in the middle of drinking his coffee, nearly choked when the news headline came on.

_Fake Wedding Official, finally captured by F.B.I: Culprit shown below, has been identified as Jacob Ben Israel. A fake officiant who has been providing couples around the world with a fake Identity, documents, and fake license. A FRAUD!_

Right below the headline, was the picture of the very same "officiant" (which they had found online) who had performed their wedding ceremony.

The couple was furious when they found out after nearly an hour of phone calls to and from a few important people, that it was indeed true. Their honeymoon was cancelled because you can't be on a honeymoon with someone you're not legally married to.

Their wedding was invalid. Not legal. They weren't legally married, and all their happiness was shot to hell.

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And now the fourth time.

Held in a beautiful little Chapel, and only contained a handful of people. The couple made sure that the officiant conducting their wedding actually had a legitimate license to wed them. There was no way they would overlook something like that again.

Puck and Quinn had actually made it inside the chapel, and were in the middle of saying their vows, when a group of masked men, showed up and tried to physically harm them as a message of sorts from Marty Davis, who apparently has some powerful connections and was able to escape from prison a week ago.

The groom, bride, Maid of honor, and Best man had worked together as a group, and managed to fight off the masked men as Santana, Kurt, Mercedes, Brittany, and Mr. Schuester evacuated the chapel. Everyone at the wedding were able to get away unharmed.

By the time the police arrived, (nearly an hour after Quinn's mother had notified them) the attackers were unconscious, Puck had a broken arm, and Finn ended up with a broken nose. Rachel was devastated that she had broken her heel while trying to castrate one of the idiots who tried to use her as a shield from an absolutely livid Finn.

And Quinn?… Quinn was just seething with rage. How dare these people show up at her wedding and ruin everything?

_Like, what the heck is going on? Is this really happening to us? Did I really strangle some masked asshole with the train of my poor dress? And who the hell's blood is on my sleeve?_ Quinn sighed as she got up off the chair and looked at Rachel who was sweating, and had dried blood on her forehead.

The two girls looked around at the ruined chapel. All eighteen attackers were either unconscious on the floor, or unconscious and hanging from a pillar, save for the guy who was hanging upside down from the chandelier.

The police were everywhere, trying to process the crime scene. Quinn rolled her eyes at how ridiculous this was getting. Her wedding was now a crime scene! There can't be anything out there that can possibly make this day any worse.

At that moment, the chandelier suddenly fell away from the ceiling, and it came crashing down along with the guy that was hanging from it. Quinn huffed and looked away, not really ecstatic about the fact that these people who tried to harm her and her fiancé and friends, were now all injured. She guesses the fighting classes Puck had enrolled them in, were actually working, but she didn't exactly want to turn out to be a crazy killing machine. Like seriously. Some of the masked men were unmasked earlier by the police, and they didn't even look close to being identifiable because of all the bruises and swelling. It's a scary thought to think, that she could be so violent. But… it's okay because they never should have tried to attack them in the first place. Now _that _would be the perfect message to send to Marty Davis. Take that, you old fucking bastard!

Quinn spotted her fiancé, limping up to her with a tight frown on his face. His suit was lost somewhere, his white collared shirt was covered in dried blood, and his pant leg was missing, as well as his left shoe. He looked as exhausted as he should be. After all, he and Finn had done most of the fighting, (which was with some really huge, bulky creeps), the groom and Best man having fought back to back while each keeping a close eye on Quinn and Rachel who handled the smaller guys quite impressively. The five guys that the two girls fought each had some sort of puncture wound, which the girls later claimed they know nothing about, but smiling secretly as they hid their stiletto heels behind them. Puck had laughed as he watched Quinn point towards the door, momentarily distracting the policeman who was interrogating her, while she threw her heel behind the pulpit. Puck always knew those things were harmful. Quinn has no choice but to admit that now.

Puck's frown turned into a little smile as he got closer to his fiancé. He was extremely relieved that she was safe, and seemed to be untouched, save for her wedding dress. Quinn's lips lifted at the corners as she moved forward and threw her arms around his neck, careful to avoid his broken arm which was slung up with the sleeve of his missing suit.

Oh why oh why is this happening to them? Why is it so hard to get married to the one you love?

"I'm sorry this is happening…" Puck paused and looked around behind Quinn. "Again." Puck murmurs into her hair.

Quinn shakes her head as she pulls away and looks up into his eyes. "It's not your fault… it was just bad timing, and those assholes are just straight up stupid as fuck."

Puck grinned and bent down to place a kiss on his would-be-wife's lips. He knows she's extremely angry because that's the only time she ever swears.

Finn walked over to the little group, with dried blood on his shirt, and face, and stood next to Rachel, gently placing his arms around her. The two couples turned to take in their surroundings, each wondering if Puck and Quinn will ever get married.

"We should be the headline of the newspaper…" Puck says, drawing everyone from their own thoughts. He puts his good arm up and pretends he's displaying a huge title in the air. "The couple who can't get married."

Quinn scowled at that. "Or maybe, 'The couple who turned into murderers because they can't get married'."

Rachel and Finn laughed at that, while Puck only pressed a kiss to his fiancés forehead.

"All jokes aside, we _will_ get married, babe…" Puck assures his fiancé. "We just have to figure out the best time and place."

Quinn nods in agreement as Finn and Rachel sigh loudly.

"Either airborne, or on water." Quinn contemplates out loud.

Puck nods, "I think airborne is out of the question… We barely survived on ground, and I just have a feeling we _won't_ survive above ground, considering our terrible luck these past few months."

Quinn nods, "Then it's settled. On water it is."

The couple shares a smile as they glance over to the Best man and Maid of Honor. "What do you say, guys?" Puck asks.

Rachel grins up at her fiancé who sighed loudly, "I say, fifth time's the charm." Finn pauses and looks away in thought before adding, "But five times is more than enough. If there's a sixth time, I'll drown myself in whatever body of water you choose to have your wedding in."

The whole group laughed at that as they slowly made their way outside. "Trust me dude, there _won't _be a sixth time. The next one is the real deal, and whether anyone likes it or not, I'm _gonna_ marry my beautiful fiancé, and there's absolutely nothing on God's green earth that could ever stop that from happening."

Quinn smiled up at her fiancé. "I love you, Puck."

Puck grinned and leaned down to kiss his fiancé, "Good… but I love you more."

"Ugh, get married already!" Finn joked and immediately hopped away as Puck swung a leg at him

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Author's Note: I know this seems unrealistic and all, but I thought it would be funny and adventurous since my other stories seem so boring. But I hope you liked this first chapter. I'll update soon, so thank you very much for reading and please review.

-Sux2budude ;)


	2. Chapter 2

Title: **Our Wedding Disaster**

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Pairing: Puck/Quinn

Disclaimer: I don't own anything… Nothing at all… Except for my stories.

Author's Note: Howdy, folks! Well, this is the second and last chapter of this particular story, but I might be adding an epilogue if I feel up to it, so thank you all for reading, and special thanks to those who review. I really do appreciate it. And now, back to the story… Onward!

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**Chapter Two:**

* * *

The front deck of a Royal Caribbean Cruise Ship. That was the location of their wedding. They planned this one with great caution, and they made sure that everything was legal, as well as private. They chose to have a self-uniting marriage, where they wouldn't need an officiant or whatever. They've already signed the legal documents, making sure they were real and whatnot, so all they needed was a little ceremony to officiate it, and their witnesses, who would be Finn and Rachel.

The only people who knew about the wedding and would be attending it, were Quinn and Puck's mothers, Puck's little sister Hannah and half-brother Jake, their glee family, Jakes girlfriend Marley, and the captain of the Cruise ship, who just so happened to be Mike Chang.

The wedding was kept a secret, so no one except for those who were attending knew about the time and place, not to mention that there was even a wedding. It's only been three weeks since the previous attempt, and everyone knew about the escaped prisoner who had threatened the bride, groom, best man, and maid of honor, so they all agreed to the confidentiality of the wedding ceremony.

Puck and Quinn had both argued with their mothers when both women had pulled them aside after the disaster (which was their latest wedding attempt) had died down. It was possibly the worst thing in the world to hear their mother's try to talk them out of getting married. The argument had lasted only two days, before both women finally let it go.

Puck and Quinn knew that their mother's were only trying to look out for them, and were worried about their safety, but… well, not getting married was _NOT_ an option for them.

Of course, they could just continue to date and be engaged for God knows how long; maybe even forever, and for a bit, Quinn had warmed up a bit to the idea of just being with each other. They didn't need a piece of paper to bind them, because truth be told, after everything they've been through together, there was nothing that could keep them apart. She loved Puck, and Puck loved her, and that was really all that they needed. So when Quinn had voiced her thoughts to her fiancé, Puck had smiled a little, and took her hand in his, pulling her into his arms. He continued to hold her in silence, before he pulled away and looked into her eyes.

"I know we don't need a piece of paper or a ring on our fingers to be able to love each other, or be together… but, I want to be able to permanently call you mine. I want you to be legally, and completely mine. I want you to finally have my name. I want to be able to introduce you to my friends as my wife, and not just my fiancé or my girlfriend. I want you to introduce me to the people from your church, as your husband, and not just your boyfriend or fiancé…" Puck pauses as he gently brushes a loose strand of Quinn's hair behind her ear. "I want to be the guy who walks into a room full of single people and proudly yell from the top of my lungs that, 'I'm married to this beautiful blonde right here.'… I love you, and I want to have as many little Quickling's who won't ask why all their friends' parents are married and we're not."

That had been the end of that conversation. Puck was going to continue with his explanations of why they should get married, but Quinn had silenced him with a heated, passionate kiss; needless to say that they spent the whole night showing each other just how much they loved each other, and just how badly they want to get married.

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Quinn smiled as she carefully laid out her wedding gown on her bed. It was nothing fancy. It's actually a lot plainer than her previous ones, and it looked a lot more like a silk, strapless, white sundress, encrusted with diamonds at the bust, but it was absolutely beautiful to her. Not because of its style, (even though the style was actually a nice touch) but it was more because this was going to be the dress that she wears when she walks down the aisle to meet her soon to be husband. She was excited and nervous, but she was also determined.

The blonde sighed as she flopped down next to her dress and stared at the ceiling. Everything was going smoothly, but she couldn't help but wonder if something was going to happen at the last minute like it did at her and Puck's previous attempts at getting married. She swears if something goes wrong like it did the last few times, she was going to murder someone.

The wedding was going to be held tomorrow at noon, and she wasn't allowed to see her fiancé, but she really could not sleep a wink; and the wait until tomorrow to finally see her soon to be husband seems like forever.

The blonde sneaked out of her room and tip-toed down the hall to the room where she was told her fiancé would be, and gently knocked on the door.

A minute later, the door swung open, and Quinn nearly had a heart attack.

Standing in the stead of her fiancé, was her maid of honor, Rachel Berry, in her pink pajamas. - T_he fuck?_

"What the heck are you doing in there?" Quinn growls as she pushed the brunette aside and went ahead inside the room, looking around the room with a strong desire to murder her fiancé.

"It's good to see you too." Rachel muttered sarcastically as she closed the door.

Quinn turned on the brunette with a murderous glare, waiting for an explanation as to why Rachel Berry was in her fiancés room.

"Okay, before you murder me with your death glares, let me tell you that I knew this was going to happen because the exact same thing is happening on the other side of this cruise ship."

Quinn's brows furrowed in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

Rachel chuckled as she went to sit down at the foot of the bed. "I told you that this would be Noah's room, right?"

Quinn nodded.

"Well, this is actually _my_ room. I knew you wouldn't be able to sleep tonight because you're nervous as hell, and that you would eventually try to sneak into Noah's room, so I kind of lied and told you that this would be Noah's room."

Quinn bit her lip as she looked away. She has just been caught. Damn.

"If it makes you feel any better, Finn just called me a few minutes ago and told me that Noah came to his room, thinking it's yours and tried to kill Finn when he answered the door instead of you."

Quinn sighed as she flopped down next to Rachel. "I just want to see him." the blonde says pleadingly.

"I know you do… He wants to see you too. But you know you're not allowed to see him until the wedding."

Quinn nodded, as she turned on her side facing Rachel.

"Do you—Do you think it's going to be okay tomorrow?" Quinn pauses, and gently pulled her feet up onto the bed. "I mean… we've been through this whole marriage thing four times, and all those times had been disasters."

Rachel turned to face her friend with a smile on her face. "If there's one thing I know about you and Noah, it's that you two are meant to be together. It doesn't matter if it's going to be okay, but I know that you _will _eventually be together. The when and where may or may not be tomorrow at noon on this very ship, but one thing is clear to anyone and everyone who knows you two… You'll be together."

Quinn let out a sigh as she smiled at her friend. "Thank you."

Rachel nods, and Quinn continues because she wants to be able to say it now before the wedding tomorrow. "For everything, Rach… For putting up with my dramatic shit, and knocking sense into me when I needed it, for being a good and loyal friend, and for agreeing to be my maid of honor for the fifth time."

Rachel snorted at that last part and leaned forward to hug her friend. "What are friends for?."

They were broken apart when there was an annoyingly loud knock on the door. Or knocks.

Rachel motioned for Quinn to stay put, while she got up to answer the door, hoping it wasn't Puck because then the couple wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight.

The door swung open to reveal Santana, Brittany, Mercedes, Tina, and Kurt all looking like they'd seen a ghost. "Someone kidnapped Quinn!" Mercedes screams, the others start talking all at the same time, each explaining that Quinn's room is empty, and no one has seen her, and that they didn't want to tell Puck yet because he was going to flip a shit, and then… utter silence.

Rachel turned around to see Quinn staring confusedly at the others who all sighed in relief and launched forward pushing Rachel out of the way to hug the blonde.

"We thought you were kidnapped again!" Kurt says in relief.

"Why would you think that?" Quinn asks as Rachel rolled her eyes and closed her door.

_No one was going to be getting any sleep now._

PQPQPQPQ

* * *

"You're sure he's outside, right?"

Rachel huffed and rolled her eyes at her friend. This is the fifth time Quinn has asked the very same question in the last fifteen minutes.

"Yes, he's standing at the altar, looking as handsome as ever, and waiting for your beautiful self to walk down that aisle to marry him." Rachel assured the blonde who smiled and nodded nervously as she tried to smooth out the nonexistent wrinkles on her dress.

"Everything is going to be okay." Quinn says loudly, not sure if she was saying it to Rachel or to herself.

"Yes… everything is going to be perfectly fine, and you're finally going to marry the man of your dreams and have a billion babies by the end of the ceremony."

Quinn smiled at Rachel's attempt at joking.

It was 11:57 and nothing out of the ordinary was happening, so Quinn happily grabbed her bouquet and followed her maid of honor out to the ship's deck where the wedding would be held.

The sound of the private band that they had hired was playing softly, and everything was so perfect. The clouds were a bit dark, but it wasn't pouring yet, so that was good.

As soon as the wedding tune played out, Quinn stepped outside the doors and smiled at Mr. Schuester who had agreed to be the one to give her away at her wedding since her father was out of the question.

She took Mr. Schuester's outstretched arm, and they made their way down the little aisle to where her fiancé stood, smiling widely at her. Quinn blushed and smiled back happily. He was cleaned up rather nicely with his black suit and white tie, looking all sexy and adorable as he bounced excitedly on his heels like a little kid. She couldn't wait for the wedding to actually end perfectly.

Quinn wanted to pull away from Mr. Schuester and shoot across the aisle and into the arms of her handsome fiancé, but she resisted the urge.

She had actually made it to her fiancés side and they were about to start their own vows and self uniting marriage, which Mr. Schuester would be binding, when there was a loud horn honking at their ship, interrupting Puck's vows. A moment later, about thirty ropes were thrown from a smaller ship onto theirs and Quinn and Puck watched in horror as a bunch of huge men climbed over the rails of the ship, clad in heavy black cloaks, and each holding some sort of medieval weapon.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." Puck groaned.

"Not again." Finn says as Rachel and Quinn glared daggers at the intruders.

Mr. Schuester, and the other former glee members immediately ushered everyone below deck, and not long after, it was Puck, Quinn, Rachel, Finn, Jake, Mike, Artie, Mr. Schuester, Santana, Brittany, Mercedes, and Kurt left on deck.

"Baby, why aren't you below deck?" Puck muttered to Quinn as his eyes shifted from one man to another. They were more like half-giants.

"Because this is our wedding, and these idiots are ruining it yet again, so I want to be able to let this day end with my heel crammed down one of these motherfucker's throats!" Quinn growls angrily as she glared at one of the huge ugly men looking straight at her. Marty Davis was standing not too far away from them, and he was grinning evilly at the couple. Boy, this guy must really hate them.

Puck grinned at his fiancé. "You're so hot when you're angry." He placed a gentle kiss behind her neck, as the gigantic men started closing in on them. Mike crouched down and rolled sideways, managing to slide across the deck in a matter of seconds, kicking open a small hatch before he pulled out a long case. He pulled it open, and to his friends delight, there were at least a dozen old pirate swords, a sledgehammer, whips, chains, axes, machine guns, and a few rifles. They each hurried over to the case to grab a weapon. Quinn being the first to take her pick, gladly took one of each, while Puck strapped two hand rifles to his shins, and took one of the swords as his main weapon. Rachel picked out one of each of the smaller weapons, and Finn screamed "Shotgun on the hammer!" as he snatched the sledgehammer away from Jake, who rolled his eyes at the taller guy and instead grabbed a whip and wrapped a foot long chain around his knuckles. Mercedes cackled loudly as she grabbed the biggest machine gun in the case, while Kurt grabbed two rifles. Santana snatched up a battle axe, Brittany hugged the little case of daggers to her chest like it was a Christmas present, while Artie and Mr. Schuester each grabbed swords. Mike nodded to his friends as he only wrapped two chains around each of his hands.

The half-giants were still standing in the same place, Marty Davis ordering them to "Let the idiot's pick their weapon's… Let's make this a fair fight." He growls as he eyes Puck, Quinn, Rachel, and Finn in pure hatred.

Puck and Quinn glanced at everyone of their friends, and Puck's brother. "Guys, you don't have to do this." Puck says to them. Most of them scoff and give him an odd look, but Santana scoffed louder than everyone else, "And let you get all the fun? Hell no." she says as she swings her battle axe over her shoulder. Mr. Schuester smiles proudly at them and says that they are a family, and families stick together till the end. The couple smile gratefully as everyone else agrees.

"This is the part where the bride and groom say something heartfelt and encouraging to start out World War 3." Artie says as Mr. Schuester gets behind him, and offering to be his partner in battle.

Puck looks around at their little army. They looked odd holding weapons while in suits and dresses. Quinn looking as beautiful as ever as she ties her hair up with the little white ribbon that had once held together her bouquet.

"SPARTAAAAANS!" Jake whispers loudly, causing the group to erupt into laughter.

Marty Davis stared in disbelief at the group who were huddled together like a football team, laughing while his men waited.

"All jokes aside guys," Puck interrupts everyone as he takes Quinn's hand in his looking at each and everyone in their group. "We just want to thank you all for doing this and being here with us… We'll always be grateful to you guys." Quinn smiles in agreement.

The group nodded with little grins on their faces. Puck noticed that not a single one of them looked scared or worried, or anything of the sort. If anything, they looked… excited? Pumped? Eager?

Puck glanced over his shoulder where the bulky men and Marty Davis were eyeing them, and waiting for a fair fight. It wasn't exactly fair when Marty Davis had like fifty men, and there were only 12 of them, but they'll take what they can.

"Okay," Puck finally says glancing back to their little group. "This is it, guys… it's do or die."

"That's supposed to be encouraging?" Finn interrupts, but shuts up immediately when Rachel turned her head to glare at him.

"Who the fuck needs encouragement?" Puck asks looking around at the group. "We're the fucking glee club of McKinley fucking high school… we don't need encouragement to get shit done. All we need is ourselves." Puck glances back at his fiancé who was smiling proudly at him. He grins at her, "All I need is right here on this ship with me." He raises their intertwined hands and pressed a kiss to the back of Quinn's hand before looking back at the group as he straightens up, "Fight like hell, and don't die." Quinn says to everyone. The group nods.

"Now let's go kick some ass!" Puck says, emitting cheers from everyone in their group.

They turn to the bigger men and hold their weapons at the ready, watching the intruders ready their own swords, machetes, daggers, and spears.

Puck turns one last time to his fiancé and plants a passionate kiss against her lips, before pulling away and charging towards the men with his sword.

Puck goes straight for Marty Davis, and he nearly bursts out laughing when he hears Jake screaming, "SPARTAAAAAAAA!" at the top of his lungs.

* * *

Not long after, there was literally a full-blown fight on the cruise ship, reminiscent of the latest wedding attempt, but with swords and guns, ropes and every other weapon they could find.

A few minutes later, the skies opened up, and raindrops began to pellet the deck, soaking everyone to the skin.

Quinn and Rachel were fighting off the attackers while in a back to back position, shooting, stabbing, and kicking everyone who dared to ruin this day.

Santana was gleefully swinging her axe at the enemies; while Mercedes cackled each time she blasted an attacker off the ship with the huge machine gun she had picked. Mikes simple instructions being, "Aim, and fire at will".

Jake was whipping away at the attackers like he was a whip expert. The sound of the whip cracking through the air.

Artie and Mr. Schuester were each swinging swords while they used Artie's wheelchair to slide across the deck, hacking at the attackers.

Finn was swinging the huge sledgehammer like he was freaking Thor, and even grinning while he did so.

Mike was flipping and flopping, hopping around like an insanely angry ninja on a mission. He was kicking, and karate-chopping everyone in his way like there was no tomorrow.

Kurt was currently driving the cruise ship and shooting away the attackers like he was freaking Chuck Norris, while Brittany hurled spears and threw little daggers at them, squealing and clapping every time she managed to land one in an attacker's eye.

And Puck… Puck was balancing himself on a beam at the top of the cruise ship, as he fought one on one with Marty Davis himself. Both men swinging swords at each other's heads, their swords meeting in midair with a ringing clang as they connected.

Quinn kept glancing up to Puck, worried that he may not be able to take on Marty Davis. The man seemed pretty good with a sword and was hacking away as Puck tried his best to defend himself.

Puck was slowly being backed to the edge of the beam, until he was at the edge and had nowhere else to go. He quickly glanced down at his beautiful fiancé who was currently kicking one of the guys on the chest as Rachel kicked the other one where it mattered. In that moment of distraction, Puck's sword was knocked out of his hand and he watched in slow motion as it went sailing through the air and landed itself on the back of the neck of one of the guys who was about to take a swing at an unarmed Artie.

Artie looked up, their eyes connecting for a second, the former AV geek, gave the former high school bully a grateful grin as he wheeled himself backwards into the knees of one of the attackers fighting Mr. Schuester, and gladly taking the sword that fell out of the attackers hand, before stabbing the attacker with it.

Puck could do nothing as he stood unarmed at the edge of the beam and watch Marty Davis give him a toothless grin.

Puck glanced behind him and figured that he was at least 40 feet off the deck of the ship, with only a rope behind him, and will surely die if he falls, considering there are at least eight spears right below him. Puck glanced back and freezes in his steps as Marty Davis puts his sword up to his throat and gives him another grin.

"Any last words before I slit your throat?" The man asks in his squeaky voice.

Puck's eyes flickered down to where Quinn barely missed a dagger being hurled towards her head by one of the giant men. One of the attackers managed to get past Rachel, whose arm was now bleeding, and grabbed Quinn from behind, wrapping an arm around Quinn's waist as he put a little dagger against her neck.

Puck doesn't know what happened to him at that moment, but he just felt an electric spark flow throughout his entire body, and his instincts just kicked in full force.

He turned his head back up and gave Marty Davis a smirk. "Yeah... Go to hell." he says before hopping up backwards and throwing his legs into the air as he grabbed the rifles he had strapped around his legs, pointing them in the sky towards Marty Davis as he continued to fall. He pulled the trigger twice on each rifle, and got the man square across the chest, throwing him off the beam and onto the other side of the ship.

Puck threw one of the rifles in his hand towards the ground where it hit the back of the head of an attacker who was holding Jake down. Puck quickly threw his arm around one of the ships ropes, and caught himself right before he could reach the spears.

He kicked the edge of the rail, creating enough force to swing himself to the side of the ship where Quinn was still being held captive, and managed to fly right over the man and let go of the rope while swinging his knee forward, effectively connecting with the side of the man's head and throwing him off balance. Puck landed on his feet and whirled around to watch as Quinn turned sharply around and brought her knee up to connect with the man's groin, the guy doubling over in pain and fell to his knees. Quinn was about to punch the man's light's out, but was beat to the punch when a dagger came hurling in front of Quinn, and landed straight in the man's eye, taking him out cold. The couple straightened up when they heard the loud excited squeals of Brittany, and they turned to see her hopping up and down, clapping her hands like an excited twelve year old who had just won a pie throwing contest.

"THANKS BRITT!" Quinn called and grabbed Puck's hand as they rushed forward to help the others.

Puck's body was still buzzing with the adrenaline rush he had on the beam, and everything and everyone was moving in slow motion before his very eyes. He glanced down at his fiancés hand around his wrist, and he knew in that moment, that there was only one way to go about this wedding disaster. Whether they liked it or not, there would always be hardships and total bullshit in their lives. But one thing was clear to him. He was going to marry this beautiful woman before him, whether or not it be approved by the court, the United States of America, or Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

Puck pulled Quinn back, "Quinn Fabray!" he yelled over the raging winds and the pouring rain.

Quinn looked up into her fiancé's face with a puzzled expression.

"Will you—DUCK!" He yells, Quinn immediately ducking down as he swung his foot over her head. His foot connected instantly with an attackers jaw, sending the man to the ground, before Quinn spun around and finished him off with a swing of her own foot to the attackers face.

"Will you marry me!?" Puck asks over the yells, winds, clangs of swords, bangs of rifles and machine guns, and the pouring rain. Quinn stares incredulously at her husband. "What kind of question is that?!" she screams as she picked up an abandoned rifle, stepped towards him, put it over his shoulder, and shot one of the attackers approaching from behind him.

Puck glanced behind him to find the man now unconscious a few feet away, and smirks as he turns back to his fiancé proudly, "Is that a yes?" Puck yells/asks with a grin.

Quinn grins widely and nods profusely, "Definitely Yes!" She screams.

No longer wanting to wait another minute, Puck frantically searches for Mr. Schuester, who was currently swinging on a rope like he was Tarzan, and kicking every attacker in his way.

"Schuester!" Puck struggles to call over all the noise.

Rachel who had just finished punching the lights out of one of the bulky guys, glanced at the couple and immediately caught up to what was going on. "SCHUESTER!" She screams, immediately getting Schuester's attention. He lets go of the rope, swinging a foot towards an attacker's face, before getting up and glancing over to the couple who were busy trying to take out the latest intruders. Puck holding Quinn's waist and swinging her around, so that her long legs were connecting with three different attacker's faces and knocking them out, cold.

"Schuester!" Quinn calls as she lets Puck handle another bulky idiot who tried to spear them.

"Yes?" Schuester calls back as he ducks under the outstretched arm of an attacker and kicks the guy behind the knees, before spin-kicking the man's face.

"Start the ceremony!" Quinn calls over her shoulder as she watches Puck jab at a new attacker with a broken spear.

Schuester, who had been kicking balls at the moment, stops and stares at the couple in disbelief. "SERIOUSLY?" he calls incredulously.

Puck and Quinn both pause in their actions to yell their answer, "YES!"

Schuester doesn't ask any more questions as he jumps onto the railing and grabs a rope before swinging himself around the ship.

"DEARLY BELOVED!" He screams at the top of his lungs, getting the attention of each and every one on the ship. He lets go when he gets to the top of the deck where Kurt was still steering and shooting at the same time, while Jake continued to whip and punch the attackers. Mr. Schuester turns to the front, grinning down at the bride and groom who were both soaked in water, blood, sweat, and had matching smiles on their faces as they both elbowed the faces of the two attackers getting back up behind them.

"WE ARE GATHERED HERE TODAY, TO CELEBRATE THE JOINING OF THIS MAN AND WOMAN," Schuester points at Puck and Quinn as everyone else continues back to fighting.

"IN HOLY MATRIMONY!" Schuester screams as he throws a piece of wood at the attacker who managed to grab Santana's arm, momentarily distracting the attacker, and allowing Santana to knee the man in the crotch.

"PLEASE SPEAK YOUR VOWS!" He calls to Puck and Quinn, before turning to help Kurt shoot a few other people off the ship.

Puck grins as he kicked an attacker in the face. "Quinn Lucy Fabray, do you take me to be your husband? To have and to—," Puck pauses to hurl his empty rifle at an oncoming attacker and managing to land it across the man's face. "hold," he continues, "In sickness and in health, through good times like when we're making our own little army of Quicklings, or in bad times—," Puck pauses again to spin a kick to the back of the idiot who dared to approach his soon to be wife. He turns back to smirk at the impressed look on Quinn's face, "like when the guy behind you is being blown to bits by Mercedes," he grins gratefully to Mercedes who was currently blowing the smoke emitting out of the tip of her machine gun. Quinn glanced behind her and nodded to her friend before turning back when Puck continues, "I promise to protect you from anything that could do you harm," he pauses yet again to pull her out of the way as a man comes flying off the top of the deck, where Mike is going Bruce Lee on everyone, and lands in the spot where she had been standing just a moment ago.

"I promise to cherish all the moments that we share, I promise to share my newly purchased Hulk sheets with you when your cold," he jokes, and grins as Quinn impressively swings the spear in her hand behind her, smacking into the face of an attacker who was just passing by to attack Rachel, who then turned at the sound of the man yelping, and driving her foot between the man's legs, and sending him to his knees.

"And last, I promise to love you more than anything or anyone could, without reservation or hesitation, even after death."

Quinn smiles, tears of joy cascading down her already wet face. "I DO!" she screams happily at the top of her lungs.

Rachel, who had just finished knocking an attacker out with the rifle that Puck had thrown towards another attacker earlier, turned and grinned. "WITNESSED!" she shouts over the screams coming from the man who Brittany was smacking around with the end of her spear.

Quinn grinned toothily at Puck who smiled back before pulling her out of the way when Santana went speeding past them with a shotgun in her hands, chasing after a particularly huge attacker.

Quinn glanced up into Puck's face and grinned, "Noah Jacob Puckerman, do you take me to be your wife, to have and to hold," she pauses when she hears someone screaming maniacally behind her and she turns to see Marty Davis finally waking up from when Puck had shot him. The man was bleeding, but didn't even seem like he was hurt because he kept coming towards them. Puck was about to step towards the man, before Quinn grabbed his arm and pulled him back, before turning to face the man. The man who Santana had been chasing a few moments ago, ran past them again, followed closely by Santana. Puck didn't have time to protest before Quinn snatches the shotgun out of Santana's hands, cocks it forcefully, before pointing it straight at the still approaching son of a bitch, and squeezing the trigger with a definite jolt, jarring her teeth at the kick of the gun. Marty Davis was thrown about ten feet away from where he had been, unconscious, and possibly dead. Quinn gives the shotgun back to Santana who continued to chase the attacker she had been chasing.

"Where was I?" Quinn asks her fiancé. Puck grins proudly, definitely impressed and slightly turned on by his soon to be wife's awesomeness. "I believe you were telling me that I could have and hold you." he smirks, "Ah, yes…" Quinn grins as the sound of Jakes whip cracked in the air and a man comes hurtling through the air above them, and landing behind her with a loud thud. "Through sickness and in health, through good times," Quinn pulls Puck towards her as she steps back, and an attacker with a missing arm lands in the spot where they had been standing a moment ago. "Like when we spend all our waking hours together, and hold each other when we're asleep, or bad times, like the past four wedding attempts. Quinn grins as Finn, Rachel, Jake, Brittany, Artie, Santana, Mercedes, and Mr. Schuester close in on them, trying to get rid of the few remaining attackers. "I promise to be a good wife to you, and mother to our future children who will surely have the most interesting parents in the entire world," Puck laughs at that, before letting Quinn continue. "I promise to put up with your childishness and immatureness, because it's all those little things about you that make you the most amazing man to ever walk the face of this unbelievably ridiculous world,"

Quinn pauses and glanced around at their friends, all doing a pretty amazing job at fighting off the attackers. "And last but definitely not the least," Quinn turns back to face a giddily grinning Puck, "I promise to love you unconditionally, with every beat of my heart, and with every fiber of my being, until my dying breath."

Puck was feeling like he was on a high. "I do!" he says immediately.

Puck and Quinn both pause to wait for Finn, who swung his barely intact sledgehammer at the chest of one of the last attackers before turning around. "Wit—," Finn paused and took a deep breath. "WITNESSED!" He screamed over the still pouring rain. Mr. Schuester smiled around at everyone, and grinned when Artie snatched Brittany's spear out of her hands and hurled it into the thigh of another attacker as Santana shoots another with her shotgun, Mercedes hurls her ammo-less machine gun at another, Jake's whip connects with the face of the same one, and Mike backflips in the air and knees the skull of the last one standing.

Everything was silent, except for everyone panting, and the ongoing rain, and raging winds. "As we witness, so shall you be sealed!" Rachel and Finn say in unison.

"The witnesses and everyone else conscious on this ship, now pronounce thee, man and wife!" Mr. Schuester yells when the rain grows heavier.

"You may now kiss your bri—," Mr. Schuester cuts himself off because the couple were already making out heavily before them.

Their entire group cheered as the couple pulled away, grinning joyfully. They looked around at Mike's ruined Cruise ship, covered in blood, sweat, and bodies, and maybe corpses of Marty Davis's men.

The group is interrupted when the familiar squeaky scream of Marty Davis is heard from one side of the ship. The group whirled around to see him standing in front of the door to the rooms below, holding a missile launcher in his hands, with an ugly, toothless smile on his face. "I WIN…" he screams loudly. "YOU LOS—," He never got to end his sentence because at that moment, the door broke off its hinges and smacked him behind the head before landing on him. Standing in the doorway, were Puck and Quinn's mom's, Mrs. Pillsbury-Schuester, Hannah, and Marley.

"Jake Puckerman! How dare you lock me in there while you have all the fun?!" Marley screams at her boyfriend who winces at the anger in her voice, and thrusts his whip into Pucks hand.

"I was just—," Marley cuts him off when she yells at him to shut up. Jake immediately nods while he nods obediently.

Puck smirked at his little brother and cracked the whip loudly, causing the others to erupt into laughter. Jake rolled his eyes at his older brother as his girlfriend inspects the thin slash across his back.

Ruth Puckerman and Judy Fabray rushed forward to check Puck and Quinn for any wounds, while Emma Schuester did the same to her husband. They had a few cuts and scrapes here and there, but were perfectly fine.

"Thank goodness!" both women sigh in relief as they saw that everyone was safe and accounted for.

Kurt had a huge gash on his forehead, half of Mercedes hair was missing, Santana was swearing loudly as she inspected her now non-existent fingernails, Brittany had a sprained ankle, Artie's glasses is missing one of its lenses, Mike knuckles and elbows were bruised, Rachel has a long cut across her forearm, and Finn nearly fainted when he finally noticed that there was a dagger, lodged in his thigh.

The people that were below deck looked around, impressed at the little group who still stood together, sweating, soaking wet, bloody, bruised, battered, and exhausted.

Puck grinned widely at his friends, who all started laughing as Finn started to hyperventilate as Rachel tried to pull the dagger out of his thigh.

Hannah, Puck's little sister grabbed her camera and backed away unnoticed by the group. "HEY!" She screamed, catching the attention of everyone on the ship. "Say, SUCKAH!" She laughs as. Puck, Quinn, Judy Fabray, and Ruth Puckerman's eyes widened at her language, Jake wasn't even looking at the camera, his eyes stuck on Marley's chest, and having been caught by Marley, who's mouth was open in mid-yell, Santana laughed, Brittany looked confused, Tina kissed Artie's cheek, Mike was staring at the rail of his cruise ship in irritation, Mercedes and Kurt were high-fiving each other, and Rachel pulled the dagger out of Finn's thigh while Finn screamed "HOLY SHIT!" the entire moment, captured on Hannah's camera.

Puck glanced at his wife and grinned happily. "We did it, babe." He mutters, drawing her attention to him. She had tears of joy in her eyes as she nodded and leaned up to kiss her husband. Finally!

"I love you, Mr. Puckerman." She whispers against his lips, ignoring the others awww's.

Puck smiled and looked around at the unconscious or maybe dead half-giants lying all over the deck, before looking back into the face that he knows he will love forever.

"I love you too, Mrs. Puckerman." He grins and leans down to meet her half-way in a passionate kiss, as the rain continued to pour down around them. Despite what they've just been through, and their clothe nearly in shreds, the whole world and disaster around them disappeared in that moment, and everything was just… perfect. After all, they've come a long way to finally be able to enjoy this moment, and there is absolutely nothing out there that could ever tear them apart, because their love went beyond death itself…

Always and forever.

The End.

* * *

PQPQPQ

* * *

Author's note: Finally it's over! Yay!... I know that some of the stuff aren't even realistic, but think of it as something that could happen in a movie… oh wait… it did happen in a movie. Lol! Oh well, It's humorous and adventurous, and absolutely fluffy in my opinion… anyways, Thank you all for reading and please review! Much appreciated.

-Sux2budude


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